Why?

• He was in a loveless, horrible and unhappy marriage where he might have been trapped in it because of kids.

• 'That marriage began well, like the honeymoon period but quickly descended into unhappiness and pain—leading him to think any loving relationship can turn really unhappy—and if he's married (committed) there is no way out—and if he does this again, he won't survive it.

• His divorce ruined him financially. So many men tell me about their conversations with lawyers, prenups and the years they will have to support a wife after a divorce and give up their savings, assets or wealth. (obligation).

This is one example of many… where a man is burned off of commitment—he would rather be alone—than be trapped in an unhappy union ever again.

So he can be totally in love—and not be able to emotionally commit… sometimes ever again ladies.

So some of these man do eventually commit if she shows up emotionally safe and feminine, but others never will, even if totally in love—they are too traumatized and not able or willing to work through their intense fears.

Fall in love with a man that can give you what you want—and understand how to date a man who is in this stage of his life if you want to give him a chance.

You are always loved,

- Gio

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In the work I do it is sometimes really sobering to see how much the love that was absent in our childhood and how we learned to cope with that absent love, drives our relationships in our adult years.

I have seen so many women caught up in patterns of co-dependence and attached to absent love.

Think about it—if you had an absent father whose love you were always searching for—the pattern established is.

His Love is absent and you must search for it.

Therefore women often fall for emotionally unavailable men whose love is absent—and only then can these women feel in love, feel intense desire→ Because they are reliving their intense childhood desire and hoping to end it, or to meet it.

And what does absent love look like→ well it often looks like emotionally unavailable men.

And when those little girls had absent human fathers to learn to relate to, they created fantasy fathers in their mind, grabbing pieces here and there from movies, books or neighborhood fathers and created the idealized father—their projection.

So when a real man comes along, they are unable to see the man, they only see Mr. Right, Prince Charming, Rescuing Knight in Shining Armour.

They can't see the human, so the emotionally unavailable man only retracts further into his shell, his fear of being known (because who can live up to that right?)

And when an emotionally available man comes along, these beautiful women often simply don't understand this and they look for ways to sabotage it…

Because they never simply received this absent love for no other reason than Being.

This leads many women to be the pursuer in relationships with men and to chase love, over—function and over-give a guy, because they always have to earn that absent love their inner little girl was chasing…  instead of allowing love to come to them.

Because when they were children—love didn't come to them, not in the way they needed it.

This is just one of many patterns that call us to evaluate the way we give and receive love before we ever expect to have a great relationship with another loving human being."

You are always loved,

- Gio

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Hi Beauties,

Very often a man's timeline for commitment takes longer than yours. Commitment brings a huge amount of responsibility for a masculine man who internally understands commitment as duty, honor and obligation.

He is going to take longer (most likely). The more eager, anxious, demanding, expectation filled you are—the more you are proving to him that you will very easily be controlling, nagging and emasculating once married—something men tell me weekly they are afraid of when it comes to marriage.

While you don't want your time wasted here by attaching and committing to him before he does, you also don't want to rush this—a baby takes 9 months, let him go through his commitment process.

Give  men the space they need to be who they are— MEN.

You are always loved,

- Gio

Photo Credit: marthastewartweddings.com

Photo Credit: marthastewartweddings.com

Men Can’t Read Our Minds

So, what would healthy  love do? Ladies, one big mistake we make is assume Men know how to love us

So when a guy messes up he can either receive grace and guidance or rejection and punishment from us. We go to punishment as a first option so very often it wrecks love and attraction fast.

The problem is when we think that mess up is a rejection or lack of love from him to us.

Assuming he already knows how to love you will have him feeling like he constantly disappoints that expectation (a man needs to know HOW to win with you.)

Love guides, fear demands, Love meets us where we are, fear constantly makes him fall short.

A High Value Woman accepts, rejects and lets a guy know how to win with her—she doesn't chase, lean forward, step in for him, pursue, fix but she knows how to have men with win her.

You are always loved,

- Gio

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Being a High Value Woman is about creating an environment around you that supports you so much you flourish and become healthy—whenever you hear us talk about "High Value" think "Healthy." When we are healthy, we come alive, blossom, in all our untamed, sexy, feminine irresistibility. Make your "healthy" a top priority—emotional health, soul health, spirit health, body health, relationship health!

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What energy are you attracted to in men? Women can choose different types of men they are attracted to—a large percentage of the women we work with are very attracted to masculine energy—and as energetic of relationship go—you create “attraction”  or polarity with an energy when you show the opposite magnetic energy. Yin, Yang. Feminine/Masculine

So tell us below—do you find healthy masculine energy in men attractive?

Or are you more attracted to a man presenting with more feminine energy?

No right or wrong—just knowing your preference when it comes to yourself, what you feel attraction to  and what you desire.

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The practice of listening in to your SOUL and creating intimacy with yourself, leads you to knowing how to have your Man open his heart to you in ways that have him feel completely devoted to you. People often ask, "I know I need Self-love but how do I make it real?"

How does self-love descend from your head into your heart?

Self-love descends into your heart when you are willing to look into what others would look away from. When you are willing to meet shame with acceptance, understanding, a listening ear, compassion and truth.

Self-love is your own gentle friendship with your own self. Your unwillingness to flinch, judge, belittle, shame or humiliate the parts of you you feel most humiliated for having.

You know— those dark parts we shudder to think we have—the jealous feelings, the real, ugly, anger, the inner needy taker, the insecure hater… the sellout, the part of us that is in a grey zone when it comes to integrity… the fears, the little child crying…

If you shame those aspects of yourself which is what self-rejection does (you reject those parts of you)... they will never get the ONE thing they need to come back into wholeness… your own LOVE.

Remember that whatever you don't listen to within yourself, gets shouted out to everyone else around you.

Today, gift yourself the space to listen in to any and all feelings, and keep asking your heart why it feels this way—no fixing, no numbing, no telling your heart what it should feel.

Being listened to is one of the most powerful forms of LOVE.

You are always loved,

- Gio

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